It is not difficult to find people that have good things to say about their decision to get divorced without destruction through the Collaborative Divorce process. Not only can it save your relationship with your kids, the flexibility of collaborative divorce may allow you to resolve the disputed issues in a custom manner that is just not available when everyone punts the decision making process to a judge that knows next to nothing about you. On top of that, this stranger is going to make some very important decisions about your life based on hearing the absolute worst about you from your spouse in an ugly drawn out litigated divorce. Is that your ideal outcome? Take some time to read these experiences and give it some thought.
We both wanted out of the marriage, but we didn’t want our children to “pay” for our mistakes. … The “process” allowed my ex and I to remain focused on this goal, rather than being focused on “getting” the other person. … Once we started working together to craft a solution we both thought was fair, we had incentive to work together – giving and taking – to reach a truly fair outcome. Through the collaborative divorce process we learned many creative ways to divide and preserve assets that we never would have thought possible. For instance, keeping the only home that the boys had ever known was extremely important to me and my children, but less important to my ex. Neither of us would have guessed that I could “buy” him out of his share of the equity in the house by giving him other assets that appeared on the balance sheet – achieving both of our goals (mine to keep the house, his to get rid of it). …Through our realtor and mortgage expert we learned how we could refinance our current house to a lower interest rate, and still allow my ex to purchase another house. I sincerely believe that we would not have known about or explored ANY of these options (and many more) unless we had used the collaborative divorce process….I was burdened by both personal health issues and family health issues during our divorce. The collaborative process allowed us to craft our solution on our own timeline – around my chaotic and unpredictable schedule. This took a horrible burden off of my shoulders at a time that I *really* needed that flexibility and understanding from the divorce process. … Neither of us felt that anyone was out to “get” us. I never felt that my ex’s lawyer was looking for ways to exploit me: she focused on both of our stated goals, as did my lawyer. “Everyone” was looking for a win-win outcome for every topic we had to address. I can’t emphasize enough how much this meant to me during what was a terribly difficult transition in my life!
Remember, not every attorney is trained or appropriate to represent someone in a Collaborative Divorce. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913 to speak with a Collaborative Divorce attorney in The Woodlands or locate a trained collaborative divorce attorney near you at http://www.collablawtexas.com/locate-a-collaborative-law-professional
Confused? Learn the differences between an uncontested divorce, a litigated divorce, and a collaborative divorce in my free Woodlands Divorce Guide