It is not difficult to find people that have good things to say about their decision to get divorced without destruction through the Collaborative Divorce process. Not only can it save your relationship with your kids, the flexibility of collaborative divorce may allow you to resolve the disputed issues in a custom manner that is just not available when everyone punts the decision making process to a judge that knows next to nothing about you. On top of that, this stranger is going to make some very important decisions about your life based on hearing the absolute worst about you from your spouse in an ugly drawn out litigated divorce. Is that your ideal outcome? Take some time to read these experiences and give it some thought.

We both wanted out of the marriage, but we didn’t want our children to “pay” for our mistakes. … The “process” allowed my ex and I to remain focused on this goal, rather than being focused on “getting” the other person. … Once we started working together to craft a solution we both thought was fair, we had incentive to work together – giving and taking – to reach a truly fair outcome.  Through the collaborative divorce process we learned many creative ways to divide and preserve assets that we never would have thought possible.  For instance, keeping the only home that the boys had ever known was extremely important to me and my children, but less important to my ex.  Neither of us would have guessed that I could “buy” him out of his share of the equity in the house by giving him other assets that appeared on the balance sheet – achieving both of our goals (mine to keep the house, his to get rid of it). …Through our realtor and mortgage expert we learned how we could refinance our current house to a lower interest rate, and still allow my ex to purchase another house.  I sincerely believe that we would not have known about or explored ANY of these options (and many more) unless we had used the collaborative divorce process….I was burdened by both personal health issues and family health issues during our divorce.  The collaborative process allowed us to craft our solution on our own timeline – around my chaotic and unpredictable schedule.  This took a horrible burden off of my shoulders at a time that I *really* needed that flexibility and understanding from the divorce process. … Neither of us felt that anyone was out to “get” us.  I never felt that my ex’s lawyer was looking for ways to exploit me:  she focused on both of our stated goals, as did my lawyer.  “Everyone” was looking for a win-win outcome for every topic we had to address.  I can’t emphasize enough how much this meant to me during what was a terribly difficult transition in my life!

Remember, not every attorney is trained or appropriate to represent someone in a Collaborative Divorce. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913 to speak with a Collaborative Divorce attorney in The Woodlands or locate a trained collaborative divorce attorney near you at http://www.collablawtexas.com/locate-a-collaborative-law-professional

Confused? Learn the differences between an uncontested divorce, a litigated divorce, and a collaborative divorce in my free Woodlands Divorce Guide

I have never had anyone endorse or say positive things about going through a litigated divorce, particularly if there are children involved. The destruction and turmoil can be very horrible on a personal level. At best, if you litigate your divorce you may end up with a little bit more property than the other side but you will have incurred some substantial personal turmoil to get it and you have to ask, is it worth it?

Collaborative Divorce is your alternative to the destruction that accompanies a traditional litigated divorce. When you choose a collaborative divorce you are taking the first and biggest step towards moving on with your life rather than spending 9-12 months (or more) in front of a judge rehashing the past and assigning blame. This is something that many people feel is worth talking about as you can see below:

Divorce is a painful event, but if there was a way to lessen the pain, collaborative divorce is the way to go. My wife and I had decided to end our 10-year marriage. We wanted to do it as amicably, fairly and easily as possible. Traditional divorce creates barriers between the parties and advocates antagonistic behavior. In the end of a traditional divorce, a judge decides based on the evidence presented. Collaborative divorce lessens the adversity and puts the power to finish the relationship back in your hands. The process is legal and logical. Lawyers help you work out any legal issues, but all of the separation of property is decided by you and your ex-spouse. It truly is a revolutionary way to approach what is arguably the worst event besides death. – Director of System Engineering at Large IT Firm

Call The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913 if you need to get a divorce without the destruction that goes along with litigation.

Are you considering divorce and are not sure where to begin?

Has your spouse already filed for divorce and you are not sure how to protect yourself?

Are you wondering:

• How much child support is involved in your divorce?
• Is spousal maintenance going to be awarded in your divorce?
• How often will you see your kids after the divorce?
• What is separate property and what is community property?
• What happens to retirement accounts in a divorce?

To help answer some of the most common questions I am proud to announce the release of my Woodlands Divorce Guide available for free download. You can get your copy by clicking on the link below.

The Woodlands Divorce Guide

If you have a question that is not answered in this version of The Guide, post your question in the comments below or contact us and we will consider it for inclusion in future editions.

It happens a lot in the divorce process. Feelings of mistrust, betrayal, anxiety and more that start out small and manageable end up growing. They continue to grow as your case goes on and eventually grow out of control. This is how your Woodlands Divorce case can end up transforming from everyone sitting at a table working to resolve ongoing problems to everyone in the metaphorical boxing ring trying to knock each other’s lights out. It happens more often than you might think. The Downward Spiral.

Parents with children usually have the most to lose if they let their divorce slide down that out of control path. Property can be replaced, but restoring Read more…

Curious about what a Collaborative Divorce can mean to you and your kids? Don’t take my word for it, listen to two couples who went through the Collaborative Divorce process themselves and discover how they preserved their irreplaceable relationship with their children and moved forward with their lives rather than digging endlessly through the past. It is only 6 minutes long and I strongly recommend anyone considering divorce with children involved take a moment to consider the choice you are about to make concerning what kind of divorce you will go through.

Read more…

The Standard Possession Order is the default schedule for visitation with children after a Woodlands divorce. There is one large category that the Standard Possession Order does not apply to. That category is children less than 3 years old. If you leave visitation up to the judge when you have a child younger than 3 you will likely not receive the Standard Possession Order.

What Will the Judge Do?

The legal responsibility of the judge in setting visitation for a child younger than 3 is to render an “appropriate order” under the circumstances that is in the best interest of the child. The judge has a lot of discretion to determine exactly what he or she thinks is appropriate, but there are some specific criteria the judge may also consider: Read more…

A contested divorce case has many stages which you may be aware of. There can be temporary orders, discovery, court hearings, depositions, court hearings, arguing, personal attacks, and more court hearings. If you are looking for a less destructive way to move on from your marriage then Collaborative Divorce may be right for you.

The Collaborative Divorce process in The Woodlands and Montgomery County has several stages, but you might notice they are quite different from the stages of a contested divorce. The stages of a Collaborative Divorce are: Read more…

Today we will review the standard possession order as it applies when the possessory conservator resides more than 100 miles from the residence of the child. There are some significant differences from the possession order that is used if you are within 100 miles of the child’s residence so review it carefully with your Woodlands, TX Divorce Attorney before your Montgomery County Divorce is finalized.

If the possessory conservator resides more than 100 miles from the residence of the child, the possessory conservator shall have the right to possession of the child as follows:

(1) either regular weekend possession beginning on the first, third, and fifth Friday as provided under the terms applicable to parents who reside 100 miles or less apart or not more than one weekend Read more…

When will you get to see your child?

When will your ex-spouse get to see your child?

These are very important questions for anybody going through divorce in Montgomery County, Texas. Whenever possible, your Woodlands Divorce Attorney will work to reach an agreement that you can be satisfied with. If your divorce attorney cannot negotiate an agreement with your ex-spouse then the final decision will likely be made by the divorce court judge. In those cases, the judge will be guided by the Standard Possession Order that lawmakers put in place as presumptively in the best interest of your child (whom they know nothing about).

For Parents Who Reside 100 Miles or Less Apart

(a)  If the possessory conservator resides 100 miles or less from the primary residence of the child, the possessory conservator shall have the right to possession of the child as follows: Read more…

If you are considering taking advantage of the benefits of the Collaborative Divorce process in The Woodlands it is important to understand the foundation for the process. After you and your spouse have decided to use collaborative divorce, you, your attorney, your spouse, and your spouse’s attorney will enter into a collaborative divorce agreement. The collaborative divorce agreement establishes an important framework for the process.

Texas law states a collaborative divorce agreement must include provisions for: Read more…