We both wanted out of the marriage, but we didn’t want our children to “pay” for our mistakes. … The “process” allowed my ex and I to remain focused on this goal, rather than being focused on “getting” the other person. … Once we started working together to craft a solution we both thought was fair, we had incentive to work together – giving and taking – to reach a truly fair outcome.  Through the collaborative divorce process we learned many creative ways to divide and preserve assets that we never would have thought possible.  For instance, keeping the only home that the boys had ever known was extremely important to me and my children, but less important to my ex.  Neither of us would have guessed that I could “buy” him out of his share of the equity in the house by giving him other assets that appeared on the balance sheet – achieving both of our goals (mine to keep the house, his to get rid of it). …Through our realtor and mortgage expert we learned how we could refinance our current house to a lower interest rate, and still allow my ex to purchase another house.  I sincerely believe that we would not have known about or explored ANY of these options (and many more) unless we had used the collaborative divorce process….I was burdened by both personal health issues and family health issues during our divorce.  The collaborative process allowed us to craft our solution on our own timeline – around my chaotic and unpredictable schedule.  This took a horrible burden off of my shoulders at a time that I *really* needed that flexibility and understanding from the divorce process. … Neither of us felt that anyone was out to “get” us.  I never felt that my ex’s lawyer was looking for ways to exploit me:  she focused on both of our stated goals, as did my lawyer.  “Everyone” was looking for a win-win outcome for every topic we had to address.  I can’t emphasize enough how much this meant to me during what was a terribly difficult transition in my life!

Remember, not every attorney is trained or appropriate to represent someone in a Collaborative Divorce. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913 to speak with a Collaborative Divorce attorney in The Woodlands or locate a trained collaborative divorce attorney near you at http://www.collablawtexas.com/locate-a-collaborative-law-professional

Confused? Learn the differences between an uncontested divorce, a litigated divorce, and a collaborative divorce in my free Woodlands Divorce Guide

Collaborative Divorce is your alternative to the destruction that accompanies a traditional litigated divorce. When you choose a collaborative divorce you are taking the first and biggest step towards moving on with your life rather than spending 9-12 months (or more) in front of a judge rehashing the past and assigning blame. This is something that many people feel is worth talking about as you can see below:

Divorce is a painful event, but if there was a way to lessen the pain, collaborative divorce is the way to go. My wife and I had decided to end our 10-year marriage. We wanted to do it as amicably, fairly and easily as possible. Traditional divorce creates barriers between the parties and advocates antagonistic behavior. In the end of a traditional divorce, a judge decides based on the evidence presented. Collaborative divorce lessens the adversity and puts the power to finish the relationship back in your hands. The process is legal and logical. Lawyers help you work out any legal issues, but all of the separation of property is decided by you and your ex-spouse. It truly is a revolutionary way to approach what is arguably the worst event besides death. – Director of System Engineering at Large IT Firm

Call The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913 if you need to get a divorce without the destruction that goes along with litigation.

Has your spouse already filed for divorce and you are not sure how to protect yourself?

Are you wondering:

• How much child support is involved in your divorce?
• Is spousal maintenance going to be awarded in your divorce?
• How often will you see your kids after the divorce?
• What is separate property and what is community property?
• What happens to retirement accounts in a divorce?

To help answer some of the most common questions I am proud to announce the release of my Woodlands Divorce Guide available for free download. You can get your copy by clicking on the link below.

The Woodlands Divorce Guide

If you have a question that is not answered in this version of The Guide, post your question in the comments below or contact us and we will consider it for inclusion in future editions.

Parents with children usually have the most to lose if they let their divorce slide down that out of control path. Property can be replaced, but restoring a child’s feelings of confidence and security with their parent can be a lot more difficult and sometimes impossible. How do you protect yourself and your children from The Downward Spiral?

Surround yourself with professionals that are focused on your future relationship with your children and helping you move on with life after divorce rather than the cliché divorce lawyer that wants to re-live every wrong thing your spouse may have done during the marriage while you pay him hundreds of dollars per hour to do so. In a litigated divorce you are working without a net and when your case is at the brink of turning into an ugly divorce your only adviser may be the one who stands to profit most from it turning ugly. In a Collaborative Divorce all of the professionals are committed to keep your case from heading down The Downward Spiral.

Part 2 of the Collaborative Divorce videos is below. In this discussion the couples mention how important the Collaborative Divorce team was to keeping their divorce from getting ugly. If they had chosen to work with a non-Collaborative divorce lawyer their case probably would have taken a very different road and they probably would not want to sit next to each other today. Which outcome do you want to see in your divorce case?

About The Author

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a Montgomery County divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913.

About The Author

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913.

What Will the Judge Do?

The legal responsibility of the judge in setting visitation for a child younger than 3 is to render an “appropriate order” under the circumstances that is in the best interest of the child. The judge has a lot of discretion to determine exactly what he or she thinks is appropriate, but there are some specific criteria the judge may also consider:

1. the age, developmental status, circumstances, needs, and best interest of the child;
2. the circumstances of the managing conservator and of the parent named as a possessory conservator; and
3. any other relevant factor.

After the 3rd Birthday

The statutes also provide that when the judge issues an order for visitation with a child younger than 3 that the judge must also render a prospective order to take effect on the child’s 3rd birthday. The prospective order is presumptively the Standard Possession Order.

Is Every Other Weekend Enough For You?

The core of the Standard Possession Order is visitation every other weekend. Many parents active in their children’s lives find this new restriction unacceptable, and rightfully so. However, in almost every case left up to the judge it is the visitation schedule the judge will fall back on as “legally appropriate” even if it is clearly unworkable in real life due to work schedules or other factors. If you want a custom visitation schedule consider Collaborative Divorce and the unique opportunities an un-litigated divorce offers to you and your children.

About The Author

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights. Contact The Shea Law Firm at (832) 592-7913.

The Collaborative Divorce process in The Woodlands and Montgomery County has several stages, but you might notice they are quite different from the stages of a contested divorce. The stages of a Collaborative Divorce are:

1. Determining your goals and interests;
2. Information gathering;
3. Development of settlement options to achieve your goals;
4. Evaluation of the options; and
5. Negotiation of the settlement.

Which Process Do You Prefer?

Collaborative Divorce is a valuable alternative if you want to avoid an unpredictable court fight with your ex-spouse. Speak with a Woodlands Collaborative Divorce Attorney today and learn about your options to achieve your goals.

About The Author

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Conroe, Spring, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights.

If the possessory conservator resides more than 100 miles from the residence of the child, the possessory conservator shall have the right to possession of the child as follows:

(1) either regular weekend possession beginning on the first, third, and fifth Friday as provided under the terms applicable to parents who reside 100 miles or less apart or not more than one weekend per month of the possessory conservator’s choice beginning at 6 p.m. on the day school recesses for the weekend and ending at 6 p.m. on the day before school resumes after the weekend, provided that the possessory conservator gives the managing conservator 14 days’ written or telephonic notice preceding a designated weekend, and provided that the possessory conservator elects an option for this alternative period of possession by written notice given to the managing conservator within 90 days after the parties begin to reside more than 100 miles apart, as applicable;

(2) each year beginning on the day the child is dismissed from school for the school’s spring vacation and ending at 6 p.m. on the day before school resumes after that vacation;

(3) if the possessory conservator:

(A) gives the managing conservator written notice by April 1 of each year specifying an extended period or periods of summer possession, the possessory conservator shall have possession of the child for 42 days beginning not earlier than the day after the child’s school is dismissed for the summer vacation and ending not later than seven days before school resumes at the end of the summer vacation, to be exercised in not more than two separate periods of at least seven consecutive days each; or

(B) does not give the managing conservator written notice by April 1 of each year specifying an extended period or periods of summer possession, the possessory conservator shall have possession of the child for 42 consecutive days beginning at 6 p.m. on June 15 and ending at 6 p.m. on July 27;

(4) if the managing conservator gives the possessory conservator written notice by April 15 of each year the managing conservator shall have possession of the child on one weekend beginning Friday at 6 p.m. and ending at 6 p.m. on the following Sunday during one period of possession by the possessory conservator under Subdivision (3), provided that if a period of possession by the possessory conservator exceeds 30 days, the managing conservator may have possession of the child under the terms of this subdivision on two nonconsecutive weekends during that time period, and further provided that the managing conservator picks up the child from the possessory conservator and returns the child to that same place; and

(5) if the managing conservator gives the possessory conservator written notice by April 15 of each year, the managing conservator may designate 21 days beginning not earlier than the day after the child’s school is dismissed for the summer vacation and ending not later than seven days before school resumes at the end of the summer vacation, to be exercised in not more than two separate periods of at least seven consecutive days each, during which the possessory conservator may not have possession of the child, provided that the period or periods so designated do not interfere with the possessory conservator’s period or periods of extended summer possession or with Father’s Day if the possessory conservator is the father of the child.

Is The Standard Order Right For You?

The Standard Possession Order is what it is, a standard order that may or may not be appropriate for your child and for you. It is not perfect, and in some cases it may be flat out wrong. Unfortunately many judges rely on the standard order when they are left to make a decision on visitation. If you want to keep this vital decision in your hands and not the hands of a judge that knows nothing about you then Collaborative Divorce may be an option for you. Speak with a Woodlands Divorce Attorney and start working towards your goals today.

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Spring, Montgomery, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights.

When will your ex-spouse get to see your child?

These are very important questions for anybody going through divorce in Montgomery County, Texas. Whenever possible, your Woodlands Divorce Attorney will work to reach an agreement that you can be satisfied with. If your divorce attorney cannot negotiate an agreement with your ex-spouse then the final decision will likely be made by the divorce court judge. In those cases, the judge will be guided by the Standard Possession Order that lawmakers put in place as presumptively in the best interest of your child (whom they know nothing about).

For Parents Who Reside 100 Miles or Less Apart

(a)  If the possessory conservator resides 100 miles or less from the primary residence of the child, the possessory conservator shall have the right to possession of the child as follows:

(1)  on weekends throughout the year beginning at 6 p.m. on the first, third, and fifth Friday of each month and ending at 6 p.m. on the following Sunday except that, at the possessory conservator’s election made before or at the time of the rendition of the original or modification order, and as specified in the original or modification order, the weekend periods of possession specified by this subdivision that occur during the regular school term shall begin at the time the child’s school is regularly dismissed and end at 6 p.m. on the following Sunday; and

(2)  on Thursdays of each week during the regular school term beginning at 6 p.m. and ending at 8 p.m., or, at the possessory conservator’s election made before or at the time of the rendition of the original or modification order, and as specified in the original or modification order, beginning at the time the child’s school is regularly dismissed and ending at the time the child’s school resumes, unless the court finds that visitation under this subdivision is not in the best interest of the child.

(b)  The following provisions govern possession of the child for vacations and certain specific holidays and supersede conflicting weekend or Thursday periods of possession.  The possessory conservator and the managing conservator shall have rights of possession of the child as follows:

(1)  the possessory conservator shall have possession in even-numbered years, beginning at 6 p.m. on the day the child is dismissed from school for the school’s spring vacation and ending at 6 p.m. on the day before school resumes after that vacation, and the managing conservator shall have possession for the same period in odd-numbered years;

(2)  if a possessory conservator:

(A)  gives the managing conservator written notice by April 1 of each year specifying an extended period or periods of summer possession, the possessory conservator shall have possession of the child for 30 days beginning not earlier than the day after the child’s school is dismissed for the summer vacation and ending not later than seven days before school resumes at the end of the summer vacation, to be exercised in not more than two separate periods of at least seven consecutive days each; or

(B)  does not give the managing conservator written notice by April 1 of each year specifying an extended period or periods of summer possession, the possessory conservator shall have possession of the child for 30 consecutive days beginning at 6 p.m. on July 1 and ending at 6 p.m. on July 31;

(3)  if the managing conservator gives the possessory conservator written notice by April 15 of each year, the managing conservator shall have possession of the child on any one weekend beginning Friday at 6 p.m. and ending at 6 p.m. on the following Sunday during one period of possession by the possessory conservator under Subdivision (2), provided that the managing conservator picks up the child from the possessory conservator and returns the child to that same place; and

(4)  if the managing conservator gives the possessory conservator written notice by April 15 of each year or gives the possessory conservator 14 days’ written notice on or after April 16 of each year, the managing conservator may designate one weekend beginning not earlier than the day after the child’s school is dismissed for the summer vacation and ending not later than seven days before school resumes at the end of the summer vacation, during which an otherwise scheduled weekend period of possession by the possessory conservator will not take place, provided that the weekend designated does not interfere with the possessory conservator’s period or periods of extended summer possession or with Father’s Day if the possessory conservator is the father of the child.

Is The Standard Order Right For You?

The Standard Possession Order is what it is, a standard order that may or may not be appropriate for your child and for you. It is not perfect, and in some cases it may be flat out wrong. Unfortunately many judges rely on the standard order when they are left to make a decision on visitation. If you want to keep this vital decision in your hands and not the hands of a judge that knows nothing about you then Collaborative Divorce may be an option for you. Speak with a Woodlands Divorce Attorney and start working towards your goals today.

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Spring, Montgomery, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights.

Texas law states a collaborative divorce agreement must include provisions for:

(1) full and candid exchange of information between the parties and their attorneys as necessary to make a proper evaluation of the case;

(2) suspending court intervention in the dispute while the parties are using collaborative law procedures;

(3) hiring experts, as jointly agreed, to be used in the procedure;

(4) withdrawal of all counsel involved in the collaborative law procedure if the collaborative law procedure does not result in settlement of the dispute; and

(5) other provisions as agreed to by the parties consistent with a good faith effort to collaboratively settle the matter.

Items #1 and #4 usually attract the greatest attention. Secrecy and trying to “pull one over” on the other party are destructive to the collaborative process so a full exchange of information is required from both parties. It is also important to note that if you are unable to reach an agreement in the collaborative process then your collaborative attorney is forbidden from representing you in any future divorce litigation – this applies to both parties.

The Woodlands Divorce Resource is here to help you with your divorce, child custody, or other family law issue in Montgomery County or Harris County. Many of our visitors come from the areas of The Woodlands, Conroe, Oak Ridge North, Cut and Shoot, and other communities in the Montgomery County area or Houston and North Harris County. If you need legal assistance with your family law issue speak with a divorce lawyer in The Woodlands, TX today and protect your rights.